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Conan O'Brien: In the Year 2000 - Mr. T  
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Tags: conan, obrien, year, 2000, Mr T, Conan O'Brien, NBC, Mister, T, pity

This is the Mr. T versions of the "In the Year 2000" skit from Late Night with Conan O'Brien: (from NBC.com)

	"Rafael Palmeiro will once again deny taking steroids, but his speech will be drowned out by the loud whooshing sound of his testicles shrinking."
	"Gas prices will get so high, they'll start hanging out with Snoop Dog."
	"Israel will pull out of Gaza, but not before contracting Gazaria."
	"Jude Law will have an affair with Red Sox slugger Manny Ramirez when he mistakes him for Nanny Ramirez."
	"The old saying "the camera adds ten pounds" will prove literally true when Kirstie Alley eats the camera."
	"The guy who played Carmine on "Laverne and Shirley" will look into a mirror and know he looks familiar -- but not know from where."
	"Pope Benedict will create a new egg recipe he calls "eggs benedict." When he is informed the name "eggs benedict" already exists, he will change his name to Pope Quevos Ranchero."
	"Britney Spears will announce she's gone into labor, and Kevin Federline, thinking labor means work, will run away!"
	"The Internet will turn ten years old. Upon hearing this, Michael Jackson will immediately ask how he can get on the Internet."
	"After five weeks in texas, George W. Bush will return to Washington, go into the Oval Office, spin around in his chair for five minutes, and return to Texas for a much-needed vacation."
	"After becoming a judge on "American Idol," Mr. T will be fired the first night for telling the other judges "I pity Abdul.""
	"After performing "The Year 2000," I, Mr. T, will change my catch phrase from "I pity the fool" to "I pity that chump Conan O'Brien.""
	"Yassar Arafat is forced back into his compound. This time because he won't stop singing Pink's Get This Party Started."
	"In an effort to be more appealing, the flu will change it's name to 'THe Flumeister'."
	"Tired of the rumors that he's gay, Liza Minnelli's husband publicly has sex with one hundred women. One hundred large bald women with handlebar mustaches."
	" Huey Lewis and the News will form a Huey Lewis and the News tribute band, just to prove that someone might actually do that."
	"Tony Danza will refuse to play any more characters named 'Tony.' The first role he gets after making this announcement: a bartender named 'Doug Danza.'"
	"I, Mr. T, will reveal that I do not have a mohawk haircut, I just went bald on both sides of my head."
	"Oral sex will be available in pill form. Unfortunately, it will be a suppository."
	"Animal experts will discover that the reason mountain goats live in the mountains is that they can get drunk faster."
	"Already reeling from the ongoing sex scandal, the Catholic Church will lose millions more followers, when Pope John Paul II appears on his balcony wearing acid-washed jeans."
	"The expression 'time will tell' will be proven invalid, when time refuses to tell what happened after it walked Debbie home from that party."
	"Mr. T has a son that he names after himself. To avoid confusion the boy is known as Mr. Lowercase T."
	"Conan O' Brien will be pitied not be me as a fool, but by fools as a superfool."

Lister: Pratt
Source: NBC.com Conan O'Brien

Other lists of interest:

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Conan O'Brien: In the Year 2000 - Jeff Goldblum FUNNY  (1)

Conan O'Brien: In the Year 2000 - Jack Black FUNNY  (0)

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