| | Academy For Better Careers - spokesman George Coe pitches commercial for people to get jobs as stand-by operators. |
| | Action Cats - a parody of action figure toys featuring plastic armor/weapons for live cats. |
| | Adobe - very unsafe car, with a sticker price of $179; made entirely of clay, it combines German engineering and Mexican know-how. |
| | Adopt John Belushi for Christmas - Candice Bergen sells people on letting John Belushi stay at their place for the holidays. |
| | Al Sharpton's Casa De Sushi - Similar to Donald Trump's House of Wings or Derek Jeter's Taco Hole, Al Sharpton (as himself) opens a Japanese restaurant even though Sharpton himself hates the food and only admits to opening the restaurant so he can pay for his political campaign. |
| | AM Ale - An alcoholic beverage for the morning because "you can't wait till afternoon". |
| | Amazin Lazer - A consumer grade laser gun for cleaning up yard waste or for use in potential criminal acts. |
| | America's Turning Gay - a parody of Dr Pepper's "Be A Pepper" ad campaign where small-town residents celebrate the sudden realization that they're homosexual. |
| | American Cancer Society - season six public service commercial where a spokeswoman Gail Matthius promises to discuss breast cancer and perform a self-exam on herself in an honest and open manner, but the promise is broken when the spokeswoman is shown with a striker bar covering her chest and explains the details of her self-exam in euphemisms. |
| | American Taser - A chain of people--a pitchman (Chris Parnell), a police officer (Jason Sudeikis), a second pitchman (Darrell Hammond), a sexual predator (Seth Meyers), a businesswoman (Amy Poehler), an angry wife (Rachel Dratch), the angry wife's husband (Will Forte), a black man (Kenan Thompson), a racist nightwatchman (Bill Hader), a militant black man (Finesse Mitchell), a Star Trek geek (Andy Samberg), and a third pitchman (host Jason Lee) each demonstrate the latest models of tasers by shocking each other until the last person (Lee) shocks himself. (http://snltranscripts.jt.org/05/05etaser.phtml). |
| | And So This Is Hanukkah - promo for celebrity-packed Hanukkah special who know very little about the holiday; was criticized by Jewish anti-defamation groups for its content. It was cut from the 60-minute reruns for Comedy Central and E!, but not the NBC reruns. |
| | Angora Bouquet - tranquilizer-laced face cleaner that "washes your brain as well as your face". |
| | Angry Dog - dog food that turns any dog into a mind-less killing machine |
| | Ass Don't Smell - Personal hygiene spray intended to keep one's buttocks smelling fresh and clean; a parody of feminine hygiene sprays. |
| | Autumn Fizz - "The Carbonated Douche." |
| | Bathroom Monkey - (performed by Janeane Garofalo), a disposable simian slave that keeps your bathroom clean. |
| | Bad Idea Jeans - a commercial featuring scenes of people discussing what can be considered "bad ideas" (for example, "Now that I have kids, I feel much better having a gun in the house"). After each scene, white text on a black background reads "BAD IDEA". Each scene also zoomed in on each person wearing said jeans (in a parody of then-current ads for Dockers pants). |
| | Bad Haircuts- A warning to overseas travelers featuring host Maureen Stapleton as one of many tourist abducted while overseas and given outlandish haircuts. |
| | Bad Seed - a venomous, near-hysterical Nancy Reagan (Terry Sweeney) debunks rumors that her daughter, Patti's, novel Home Front is based on real life and pitches her own book that she co-wrote with Stephen King. |
| | Balls Off - [wife speaking] Here's where undesirable behavior gets started... in the "freedom center" (schematic depicts husband's groin). Signals are sent to the brain... balls off BLOCKS those signals. Balls off, in regular, and new Italian strength. |
| | Berkeley Collection - Jerry Rubin sells wallpaper with popular protest slogans from the 1960s and 1970s. |
| | The Best of the First 20 Minutes - parody of Saturday Night Live creating made-for-video clip shows has SNL sell the Cameron Diaz/Smashing Pumpkins episode before it's even finished. |
| | Big Brawn Feminine Napkins - large, rough-looking menstruation pads, with a song sung by a 50-foot tall lumberjack Will Ferrell to a regular sized Molly Shannon whose roof he has just torn off of her house to find her in the bathroom and in need. Parodies ads for Brawny paper towels. |
| | Big Red - a toy Viking figure that spins around, spraying red liquid from of the horns of a stereotypical Viking helmet (absurdist parody of 'water sprinkler' type toys). Furthermore, the liquid is revealed to be hazardous as evidenced by the thick utility gloves included in the package included to clean up the resulting mess from the toy. |
| | Bio-Flex - parody of exercise equipment commercials where Will Ferrell is attacked by a half-man/half-monkey creature, which is considered a workout. |
| | Blaine Hotel- Bumper during Weekend Update. Don Pardo announces that guests of the Saturday Night stay at the Blaine. Usually followed a Weekend Update report about yet another grisly murder at the Blaine Hotel. Parodies actual promotional announcements for the Essex House, where hosts actually stayed during the early seasons. |
| | Booty Bidness - rapper Ludacris (as himself) pitches a new line of women's businesswear with racy phrases on them, such as "Porn Star," "Bi-Curious," "Tasty" (written on the rear end of a skirt), and "Nympho." Originally, the clothing line was called "Casual Bitch" and was seen on the dress rehearsal version of the episode hosted by Hugh Laurie. |
| | Brew Dude - a hat that dispenses beer for the college student who would rather party than study. |
| | Budd Light - a parody of the Bud Light "Bring Out Your Best" ad campaign, Robin Williams and Joe Piscopo are two ice hockey players at a faceoff. The pay off comes when Piscopo says, "He ain't so bad. I don't know why my wife ran off with him," the puck is dropped immediately, a fight breaks out, and the voice over begins. The ad ends with Williams and Piscopo sitting on the ice and sharing a beer with gap-toothed smiles. |
| | Buh-Weet Sings - (Eddie Murphy) All grown up, Buckwheat from Our Gang has recorded a compilation of songs sung in his own and very personal style, such as "Fee Tines a Mady," "Una Panoonah Banka," "Wookin' Pa Nub" and "Barbah ob Dabil," dedicated to his friend Alfalfa. |
| | CEO Dreamboats - a magazine with famous businessmen as objects of desire for teenyboppers. |
| | Calvin Klein Cream Pies - Julia Louis-Dreyfus plays Andy, an annoying jean model who gets hit in the face with a custard pie after one of her shallow, rambling stories. |
| | Canis - Cologne for Dogs (parody of a Calvin Klein fragrance ad). |
| | Caribbean Essence Bath Oil - bubble bath solution that has a West Indian man (Tracy Morgan) pop up during the bath and carry his bathers across a beach. |
| | The Chameleon XLE - a luxury car on the inside, a dilapidated wreck on the outside, with such features as simulated transmission fluid leak, mismatched hubcaps (one painted school-bus yellow), coat hanger antenna and a supple, leather and wood interior, to deter the high risk of theft that accompanies luxury cars. |
| | cheapkids.net - a website dedicated to the sale of shoddy items for babies and toddlers (i.e., expired immunizations, used pacifiers, defective clothes, etc.) for irresponsible parents. |
| | Chess for Girls! - a parody of marketing children's toys based on gender. Unrelated to the chess game in general, a chess set in which all the pieces have Barbie doll-style bodies and chess piece heads; comes with accompanying dollhouse, beach wear, minivan, bubble blower, and so on. ("A classic game of strategy and wits...and bubbles!) |
| | Chia Head - parody of Chia Pet/Minoxidil ("Not for use in salads!") |
| | Citizens for a Better America - Dr. Swen Gazzara (played by one-seasoner Gilbert Gottfried) proves the value of hard work in America by asking Ronald Reagan to personally give him a "hum job." |
| | Classic Sing-Along with the Drunken-Asses - album featuring popular songs as sung by inebriated office workers. |
| | Clerasil (or Clärasil, pronounced with strong German accent), appeared in the SNL Sprockets parody of German pop culture. In this feature, a young woman uses Clerasil to get her pimples away to get a new boyfriend. The word "pimples" in English is however confused in the sketch with the German word "pimplen" which is a strong German slang word with the same meaning as the English "fuck" (in the sexual sense). In the end of the commercial the speaker says in half-English/half-German that Clärasil will take the pimples/pimplen away - that is it will destroy your sex life. |
| | Clovin Hind Jeans - parody of the infamously racy Calvin Klein commercials that featured Brooke Shields. Season six castmember Gail Matthius plays Brooke in the commercial parody. |
| | Cluckin' Chicken - (Phil Hartman as the father and Adam Sandler as the voice of Clucky) A fast-food restaurant's animated mascot, when asked why he tastes so good, gleefully describes his death, decapitation, disembowelment, flame-broiling, and eventual consumption and defecation by humans. |
| | Cold Cock Malt Liquor - Tim Meadows and Ellen Cleghorne enjoy a tall can of this beverage, where with each sip summons a cartoon fist that whacks the drinker upside the head. |
| | Colon Blow - parody of high fiber cereals (notably Total), a man (Phil Hartman) is told he'd need 30,000 bowls of his usual cereal to get the fiber of a single bowl of Colon Blow. Also available is Super Colon Blow, fiber content equal to that of 2.5 million bowls of the man's regular cereal. Each time a number is quoted, a pyramid of the same number of bowls appears under the man, rocketing him into the sky. |
| | Colonel Belmont's Old Fashioned Horse Glue - Will Ferrell stars as Langford T. Belmont, a man whose family has been in the horse glue business for generations. It is a parody of commercials that try to appeal to old-fashioned values and tradition. |
| | Compulsion - a "Calvin Kleen" disinfectant, mocking Obsession perfume and featuring an obsessive compulsive spokesmodel (played by Jan Hooks). |
| | Cookie Dough Sport - parody of Gatorade sports drink for athletes who are emotionally distressed and need cookie dough as comfort food. |
| | Corn Chip Nail Tips - (Tracy Morgan and Maya Rudolph) Parody of "hip" potato chip commercials, featuring corn chips that can be used as fake fingernails. |
| | The Crests And Troughs Of Vernon Hawley Jr. (John Larroquette)- album about a country-western singer's bouts with alcoholism. |
| | Cracklin' Oat Flakes (Now With Ecstasy) - Will Ferrell wakes up to find that he has run out of his normal cereal, Cracklin' Oat Flakes. His wife then offers Cracklin' Oat Flakes, now with ecstasy. He creeps out his coworkers, makes out with Chris Parnell), then runs half-naked through the streets until he's seen in bed with a pacifier in his mouth, playing with a rattle. |
| | Creeley's Soup-sketch in which Gilda Radner, playing a child eating her soup, is annoyed by the announcer. He tells her that he will give her various things in exchange for the soup, and she says no until she finally gets frustrated and tells him "No, leave me alone, I'm eating!" The announcer then proceeds to tell her to take the little pieces of corn and shove them up into her nose. She asks why, and the reply is "because the soup man says so." She does. After pouring the bowl of soup all over her nose because according to the announcer "there's nothing better for a stuffy nose than nice hot soup," the slogan for "Creeley's Soup" comes on the screen, while the announcer says "Creeley's Soup. The Child Handler." |
| | Crystal Gravy - parody of the clear cola craze, specifically Crystal Pepsi, and Obsession commercials. Kevin Nealon swims in a pool and french kisses a dog. |
| | Dallas: The Home Game - Charles Rocket pitches a home board game for dysfunctional families who can now act out their problems the same way the Ewings do on the 1980s drama "Dallas". |
| | Del Stader's Rabbit Hut- Restaurant specializing in rabbit, where customers choose, kill and prepare their own rabbit dinners. |
| | Derek Jeter's Taco Hole - Derek Jeter, as himself, pitches a taco restaurant in his hometown of Pequannock, New Jersey, similar to Donald Trump's House of Wings, with a jingle sung to the tune of the Beach Boys song Kokomo. |
| | Die Foreigner Die - fake movie trailer for an action movie starring Sylvester Stallone and Chuck Norris out to kill anyone not legally from the United States. |
| | Dillon/Edwards Investments - a conservative financial company advertises in a deadpan tone that they are finally on the internet, with the only web address left by the time they got around to it: "clownpenis.fart". |
| | Direct Hits - George McGovern plays a general selling an album of military-themed rewrites of popular songs (e.g. "My Boyfriend's Back" is rewritten as "Deploy Dense Pack"). |
| | Disco Meltdown - season six fake commercial for a hip, new dance club in the reactor core of a nuclear power plant. |
| | Dissing Your Dog - Will Ferrell sells a dog training video for passive aggressive dog owners. |
| | Do You Know Me?- In a spoof of American Express ads, a soap-opera parody called "An Oval Office" (Dan Ackroyd as Jimmy Carter, John Belushi as Bert Lance) suddenly becomes a credit card commercial when Lance, who had recently resigned under a cloud as Director of the Office of Management and Budget, begins addressing the camera. |
| | Dog Assassin - selling an alternative to euthanasia of your dog. |
| | Donald Trump's House of Wings - Donald Trump's own chicken wing restaurant, featuring Donald Trump as himself, Horatio Sanz as David Crosby, and four cast members (Seth Meyers, Kenan Thompson, Amy Poehler, and Maya Rudolph) as singing employees in chicken costumes. |
| | Dopenhagen and Happy Daze - David Carradine plays a cowboy who likes to get high on marijuana he can chew instead of smoke. Parody of Copenhagen chewing tobacco. |
| | Dr. Porkenheimer's Boner Juice - parody of erectile dysfunction treatments. Incidentally, the commercial is either edited out completely or re-edited when rerun on NBC and E!; the originally aired version was more graphic, ending on a shot of Rob Riggle with an enormous erection. |
| | Drums, Drums, Drums - Chevy Chase's album featuring his drum solos (Late Night with Conan O'Brien did a similar bit, only with Max Weinberg). |
| | DynaCorp - announcer (voice of Chris Parnell) confuses Jessica Simpson with food products similar to Chicken of the Sea brand tuna. Parodies Jessica Simpson's remark on the MTV reality show, Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica, where she asked Nick Lachey if Chicken of the Sea was tuna or chicken. |
| | Dyson Toilet - Parody of Dyson vacuum cleaner ads. |
| | Easy Date - Parody of eHarmony and other matchmaking websites. All of the matches are alluded to be between prostitute and client. |
| | Ed McMahon's School of Laughing - a school that trains people who want to make money by performing on laugh tracks. |
| | Eddie Murphy--Good Samaritan - promo for a TV show about former SNL castmember Eddie Murphy (played by fellow black castmember, Tim Meadows) helping out transvestite prostitutes (parodying the incident where Murphy was pulled over by police for helping a transvestite prostitute). |
| | Einstein Express - An express courier service that handles late arriving packages by sending them literally back in time to the desired arrival date. The slogan is "When it absolutely, positively has to be there the day before yesterday." |
| | Elian! The Cuban Boy- Promo for Disney-produced Broadway musical about Elian Gonzales, the actual young boy turned over to his father in Cuba after resistance from relatives in Florida. |
| | "Energy for a Gullible America"- Parodies Exxon's "Energy for a Strong America" campaign. Don Pardo is the voiceover announcer for a spot decrying high production costs for elaborate oil-company commercials and offering this as an excuse for high energy prices. |
| | Enzo - an early 1980s commercial parody for mouthwash made after Ozzy Osbourne (played by Tim Kazurinsky) gets entrails stuck in his teeth from biting the heads off bats. |
| | EternaRest Coffin Mattresses - padding that outlasts the corpse in caskets. |
| | Eych! - "Eych! It's the only hairball remover that cats ask for, by name." A spoof of Meow Mix, but instead the cats cough in an exceedingly funny way. |
| | Excedrin RT- Queen Latifah plays a businesswoman who takes an aspirin to combat headaches brought on by interns asking questions about the stereotypical behavior of black people. |
| | FX-70 Cheese Slicer - Candice Bergen pitches a Polaroid camera that dispenses cheese slices. |
| | Federline - Kevin Federline (played by Ashton Kutcher) pitches his new line of briefs in order to get out of the shadow of his wife, Britney Spears. Shown in black-and-white reminiscent of the early Calvin Klein commercials. |
| | First Citiwide Change Bank - bank which specializes in making change. Profits based on volume. A parody of late 1980s "talking head" bank advertisements. |
| | Flex - deodorant laced with steroids that cause its users to behave like animals. |
| | Fresh Baseball - Bob Uecker's new drink made from pureed baseballs. |
| | Fried Chicken Fields Forever - VH-1 movie promo for a biopic about the trials and tribulations of Beatles members Paul McCartney (Alan Cumming) and John Lennon (Jimmy Fallon) opening a chicken restaurant. |
| | The Fruiting - a fake movie trailer for a horror flick where citrus fruits attack a family living in a haunted mansion. |
| | Gandhi and the Bandit - fake movie trailer for Smokey and the Bandit-esque movie with Mahatma Gandhi in the starring role. |
| | Gangsta Bitch Barbie - new Barbie doll perpetuates stereotypes of black people living in the ghetto (the doll comes with Jolly Ranchers, a pack of Newports, and a restraining order against her boyfriend, Tupac Ken). Parodies use of hip hop culture in advertisement. |
| | Galactic Prophylactic - Prophylactics made with a steel core for extra durability. Parodied the Ron Popeil infomercials. |
| | Gary Busey Motorcycle Helmet - following Gary Busey's near-fatal helmetless motorcycle crash, this clip featured Phil Hartman as Busey endorsing a new line of protective headgear. On top of the helmet, the ad featured an enormous foam rubber "helmet protector," and mentioned a "helmet protector protector" which was too large to be shown. |
| | Gaystrogen - a parody of the Estroven hormone drug about a drug for men over 45 suffering from "queer loss." |
| | Gidget Goes To Shock Therapy - a psychiatrist (Jane Curtin) interrupts a sketch featuring three women acting like little girls to report that they all suffer from a mental disorder that makes them act childish. |
| | The Goombahs - Because of the success HBO received with The Sopranos, Showtime creates its own show about a Mafia boss and his family. |
| | Grable and Lombard - fake movie trailer about the lesbian wedding of Betty Grable and Carole Lombard. |
| | Graffiti: Say No - Rudolph Giuliani cracks down on graffiti artists defacing the city by adding insults next to their handiwork. |
| | Grayson Moorhead Securities - lampoons brokerage companies projecting a competent, trustworthy, ethical image, although the company representative being interviewed is anything but. |
| | Handi-Off - A topical treatment used for removal of excess fingers. ("Also try new 'Toe-Riffic' for toes!") |
| | Happy Fun Ball - a seemingly simplistic children's toy with numerous disclaimers for absurdly dangerous health hazards. "Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball," and "Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin." |
| | Harley's Bristol Cream - a parody of Harvey's Bristol Cream, in which Gilda Radner gets progressively drunk on the product and begins shouting out of her apartment window at passersby, trolling for dates. |
| | Have a Nice Day - a trailer for a horror movie where smiley faces haunt potential murder victims. |
| | Hedley and Wyche: The British Toothpaste - spoofs the popular belief that the British have bad teeth, by showing them using a toothpaste sweetened with sugar. Mike Myers starred in this commercial and later recycled the joke in Austin Powers. |
| | Heil Hits - a spoken-word album featuring Adolf Hitler's speeches. |
| | Hey, You - a perfume for women in search of a one-night stand. |
| | Hell (A Message From The Almighty) - parody of 1980s Michelob commercials where Jon Lovitz, Randy Quaid, Damon Wayans, Anthony Michael Hall and others are shown celebrating their latest conquest in the business world and living the good life until the end of the commercial where they all burn in Hell for living empty, overly ambitious lives. |
| | Helmsley Spook House - Leona Helmsley (played by Nora Dunn) creates a haunted house with the same style, class, and obedient workers as her hotels. |
| | HiberNol - parody of NyQuil ads featuring a cold medicine designed to knock a person out for the entire cold and flu season. |
| | Hire The Incompetent - a temp agency that uses unskilled workers for hire. First appearance of Gilda Radner's recurring character Roseanne Roseannadanna. |
| | Holding Your Own Boobs Magazine - commercial for magazine featuring male and female celebrities cupping their breasts. Features Sarah Michelle Gellar (who was really topless) and Will Ferrell. |
| | Home Security Decoy - mannequins posing as criminals already breaking into a house to trick real thieves into thinking its already being robbed. |
| | Homocil - a special drug that helps reduce the stress of parents with homosexual children. "Because it's your problem, not theirs." |
| | Horror Movie Trailers- During Tony Perkins' monologue, the audience is shown trailers for ill-conceived horror flicks like "Driven to School" (about a boy whose mother won't let him walk to school) and "Dressed to Kill" (preceding the Brian de Palma movie of the same title, this one is about women duped into purchasing clothing with fatal features like spikes that stab anyone attempting to come into physical contact with them). |
| | Huggies Thong - useless diapers shaped like thongs, parodying parents who dress their children in risque clothes more suited for adults. |
| | Infiniti Toilets - Mike Myers doing 2 toilet ads (same style as the Infiniti J30 commercials). The toilets advertised have such features as a slide-in cupholder and a non-stick coating. |
| | Iranian Joke Book - Charles Rocket pitches book on how to fake kidnappings and executions from Iran |
| | I Was Not a Sucker for Saturday Night - Laraine Newman (as her recurring character, Sherry) pitches a book about her risque encounters with the male writers of Saturday Night Live. |
| | J.J. Casuals - Jack Johnson (Andy Samberg) promotes shoes shaped like bare feet for those who are as casual as he is. |
| | Jackass: The Musical - promo for Broadway play about the dangerous stunts from MTV's Jackass. |
| | Jamitol - Spoof of Geritol in which a husband (played by Chevy Chase) extols the virtues of the multivitamin that has kept his wife, who happens to be male (played by Michael O'Donoghue) working to the point of exhaustion. ("My wife. I think I'll stuff her.") |
| | Jams - Carries the Smucker's Jams slogan ("With a name like Smucker's, it has to be good!") to absurd extremes, promoting jams that taste so good that the manufacturers dare to give them horrible and disturbing names. Most members of the first season cast appear as spokepeople each trying to outdo each other on the "best" jam in the following order: |
| | Jams - Jane Curtain - Fluckers "It's got to be good!" |
| | Jams - Chevy Chase - Nose Hair "You can imagine how good it must be mm-mm!" |
| | Jams - Dan Aykroyd - Death Camp "Just look for the barbed wire on the label!" |
| | Jams - John Belushi - Dog Vomit + Monkey Pus "This stuff has got to be terrific!" |
| | Jams - Chevy Chase - Painful Rectal Itch "The taste? (kisses fingers)" |
| | Jams - Dan Aykroyd - Mangled Baby Ducks "Great jam! Beautiful jam!" |
| | Jams - John Belushi - 10,000 nuns and orphans who were eaten by rats "O so good!" |
| | Jams - Garrett Morris then brings in a jar thats "So disgusting you can't say it on television!" |
| | Jenson Mint - phony dollars and coins for rich people who want homeless panhandlers to leave them alone once and for all. The 60-minute syndicated version has the middle-finger gesture on the backs of the coin and the dollar bill digitally obscured and on a late-night NBC rerun, the commercial was edited out entirely. |
| | Jewess Jeans - brand of jeans Gilda Radner models; no one has to be Jewish to wear them, "but it wouldn't hurt." Parodies Jordache Jeans commercials. |
| | Jiffy Express - when it had to be there yesterday, they'll back-date packages and simulate shipping delays. |
| | Jiffy Pop Air Bag - eat popcorn while you're waiting for the ambulance to arrive. Plays on familiarity with Jiffy Pop popcorn. |
| | Jogger Motel - "Joggers jog in, but they don't jog out." Plays on familiarity with the Roach Motel. |
| | Jose Cuervo Institute - college student (Randy Quaid) touts the party school's medical care program after he was injured from being used as a human battering ram (shown during the game show sketch, "Jose Cuervo's Party School Trivia Bowl"). |
| | K-Put Price-Is-Rite Stamp Gun - A price-stamp gun that allows shoppers to freely alter the prices of various goods (particularly groceries) in their own favor. |
| | Kannon AE-1 - A camera "so simple, so advanced, even Stevie Wonder (as himself) can use it." Spoof of Canon AE-1 SLR. |
| | KCF Shredders - Lampoons fast food industry's marketing to kids, in this case with coleslaw. |
| | "Law & Order: Parking Violations Unit" - Parody of the numerous "Law & Order" spinoffs that were premiering at the time. |
| | Lemon Glow - an ex-biker chick (played by Molly Shannon) tells the audience about her drugs-and-sex days while cleaning her middle class house. |
| | Leland-Meyers Home Headache Test (HHt) - Home test designed to determine if one is really having a headache or not, requiring the tester to "draw a moderate amount" of one's own blood, place drop on a test strip, and wait two hours. If the spot turns blue, you have a headache! Parody of at-home pregnancy tests featuring Kevin Nealon & Janeane Garofalo. |
| | Little Chocolate Donuts ("The Donuts of Champions") - endorsed by "decathlon champion John Belushi" - a parody of Wheaties' Bruce Jenner ads. |
| | LooseBear - a hallucinogenic laxative that makes you dream you're being chased by a hungry bear, thus "scaring the crap out of you". |
| | The Love Toilet - Victoria Jackson & Kevin Nealon share the most intimate moment of them all... The commercial featured a single-based toilet with two seats placed so that the seated users faced each other. "Because when you're in love, even five minutes apart can seem like an eternity." The commercial is set to beautiful instrumental music (unidentified) |
| | The Lung Brush - used every night by heavy smoker Chris Farley to remove quarts of tar from his lungs before going to bed with wife Victoria Jackson. "Did you forget to brush?" |
| | Lux 420 SL- The car for crazy people. Parody of car commercials that featured Will Ferrell playing a crazy man. The car was designed by such people as Nostradamus and featured an in-console sink for compulsive hand-washing, along with enough trunk space to hold copious vials of one's own urine. Also featured the jingle: "There's a radio in my fingernail...CAR!!" |
| | Man-Bra - A parody of a 1960s era commercial with a group of people playing beach volleyball. An obese man complains that his breasts hurt from the activity. The solution is "Man-Bra: For the Brawny Brawny Man", with accompanying comedic theme music. |
| | McIntosh Jr. The Power to crush the other kids - an elementary school cafeteria parody of the early Macintosh computer ads. |
| | McIntosh Post-It Notes (sic) - parody of the Apple Newton MessagePad. Also plays on familiarity with Post-It Notes. |
| | Meat Wagon Action Set - A model racing set with crash-and-burn action, and an ambulance; a product of Mainway. |
| | MeHarmony.com - a 2000s parody of eHarmony; a matchmaking website for people who are only interested in themselves. Testimonies given by various SNL cast members in normal appearance and in drag. Ends with announcement of a second service "coming soon:" HeHarmony.com, a gay matchmaking site. |
| | Mel's Char Palace - a steakhouse in Paramus, New Jersey where you select your own cuts, portions, and even the cow. |
| | Mentl - movie promo about a mentally unstable Barbra Streisand (played by Joe Piscopo). Parodied the Streisand movie, "Yentl". |
| | Mercury Mistress - This commercial is a parody of advertisements for luxury cars. The car features a rubber vagina behind its license plate. The slogan for the car is "A car so sexy, you'll just want to have sex with it.". This sketch was cut in reruns because of its content. |
| | Metric Leisure Time - Promoting the adoption of a 100-hour/day "Metric Leisure Clock", this sketch parodied efforts to convert the United States to the metric system, by suggesting that everyone would have many hours of leisure if they crammed one hundred hours into a single day. |
| | Metrocard - A credit card commercial starring Roseanne Barr as a sassy customer service representative and Phil Hartman as a distraught business traveler. "Yeah, like I've got nothing better to do than to sit around and listen to him bitch!" Parodied a series of Citibank credit card ads telling a customer's story from the point of view of both customer and service representative. |
| | Michael Jordan Feminine Hygiene Products, Michael Jordan X-Rated Video Library. Played on familiarity of popular athlete Michael Jordan as a wholesome pitchman for products (shown in the monologue on the episode hosted by Michael Jordan). |
| | MMMPH! - A trivia board game, where the only clue allowed is muffled shouting. |
| | Mohawk Master - Dan Aykroyd pitches a shearing device that gives you the perfect mohawk. |
| | Mom Jeans - They fit Mom just the way she likes it! ("She'll love the 9-inch zipper and casual front pleats!") Fictitiously sold at JCPenney. |
| | Mommy Beer - beer packaged in baby bottles. |
| | More Duets That Prove That I Am The Best Singer In The World -- Celine Dion (played by Ana Gasteyer) releases album where she sings duets with today's hottest music stars and ends up stealing their thunder. |
| | Navy Adventure (Port of Call: Bayonne, New Jersey) - Instead of training and missions, this spot featured the soldiers doing other things, such as cleaning toilets, peeling potatoes, and doing laundry. "It's not just a job; it's $96.78 a week." |
| | NBC Fall Season- Parody previews of multiple shows, such as "Black Vet" (a super-earnest drama about a black veternarian) allegedly on the upcoming fall schedule. |
| | NBC Holiday Preview- Bill Murray promos holiday specials with parakeets playing human roles. In a similar feature, costumed birds parodied films like "Lawrence of Arabia" with dubbed-in impersonation of Peter O'Toole. |
| | NBC ID- Spoof of NBC slogan, "NBC. Proud as a Peacock." Five-second display of animated NBC logo accompanied by jingle: "NBC. Smart as a Peacock." |
| | NBC Promos-Promos highlighting the complete line-ups for several evenings of programming, in which the voice-over announcer, apparently indicating the network's embarrassment over the arguable quality of the sitcom "Blossom", speaks more quickly and quietly whenever mentioning the show. |
| | Nebulzitol (No-Balls-At-All) - aired in March 2005 and featured a husband and wife getting along during a sports game. Essentially a ripoff of the Balz-Off commercial. |
| | Nerf Crotchbats - parody of Nerf seemingly running out of ideas for new products; an off-scale baseball bat made from nerf material. Chris Farley and David Spade, with a group of children, are bored. Suddenly, Farley gleefully announces "CROTCH BAT!". The bats appear and the group wields them, repeatedly striking each other in the genitals with them while stereotypical commercial theme music plays. Also advertised is "Nerf Nerf", a formless plasmatic blob of Nerf foam material. |
| | Network Battle of the T's & A's - parody both of 1970s television specials featuring stars from the three major American TV networks (Battle of the Network Stars) and of the trend of "T & A" ("tits and ass") programming featuring suggestively clad women. |
| | Neutrogena Coin Slot Moisturizer - parody of various Neutrogena ads for specialized moisturizing products. Featured host Lindsay Lohan and feature player Kristen Wiig as young women in low-rise jeans. Premise is that since new fashions leave your coin slot exposed to sun and wind, a special moisturizer is required to keep it soft and smooth. |
| | New Shimmer - Gilda Radner and Dan Aykroyd play a couple having an argument over whether New Shimmer is a floor wax or a dessert topping ("it's a desert topping, YOU COW!"), then Chevy Chase (as a product demonstrator) steps in and states that "New Shimmer is a floor wax AND a dessert topping!" |
| | Nicotrel - a parody of "quit smoking" products featuring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as ex-Army soldier Nick Cotrell who beats up a wimpy husband (played by Chris Parnell) to get him to quit smoking. And at the end of the skit other wrestlers which include Mick Foley , Paul "Big Show" Wight, and Paul "Triple H" Levesque. |
| | Nikey Turkey - featuring Chris Rock, this parody offers a good Thanksgiving solution to a small turkey for a large party: pump it up. Plays on familiarity with a then-popular athletic shoe from Reebok with a pump feature. |
| | Nike Air Force - features male castmembers Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, Will Forte, Kenan Thompson, Andy Samberg, and Jason Sudeikis playing basketball and messing up, which ends with Samberg getting injured. |
| | Old Glory Insurance - a parody of shameless insurance companies. Sam Waterston, in a deadpan performance, touts the advantages of the only life insurance company to provide full coverage against the leading killer of the elderly: robot attacks. |
| | Only Bangkok - parody of Las Vegas's "What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas" commercials shown in three parts. In part one, a businessman (played by Seth Meyers) calls his friend for the number of a Dutch man who can help him remove a Thai hooker who ended up dead after he had sex with her. In part two, Ben Affleck (playing himself) sells his wife (played by Amy Poehler) to two burly mob members after losing a bet during a Russian Roulette match. In the final one, Seth's businessman character is back and on the phone with the Dutch man about the removal of a dead prostitute, but this time, the prostitute is a male. Also joining the businessman is Affleck in a pink robe, earrings, and wearing make-up (who asks the Dutch man [played by Darrell Hammond] if he's interested in buying panda meat) and a paranoid Kelly Ripa (in a cameo appearance) wielding a meat cleaver and egging the businessman to cut the prostitute up and put the remains in a bag. |
| | Oops I Crapped My Pants - a brand of adult diaper, a parody of Depends, and a play on the use of statements as product names (e.g. "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter"). |
| | Pan Am Ad - in the style of a political ad, lists the family leave benefits of a number of European countries, compares with the paltry benefits that would have been introduced by the Family and Medical Leave Act of 1991, which was vetoed by then-president George H. W. Bush. It then switches to a scene of an airplane departing, stating "Pan Am has one-way tickets to...", followed by the same list of European countries. |
| | Pay-Less Beer- Appears briefly during news segment. Consists entirely of a still photo of a can of the product and a Brooklyn-accented male voiceover: "Pay-Less Beer. Why pay more?" |
| | The Paradox - two automotive design teams produced two completely opposite cars (e.g., one was the most expensive car ever, the other the cheapest; one was the safest, the other designed to throw flaming victims hundreds of feet in a crash). In the end the two were combined to create The Paradox. |
| | Pennzoil - endorsed by poet Maya Angelou (impersonated by David Alan Grier). |
| | Personal Product- Gilda Radner extolls the virtues of a product for women that's so personal, no one can say what it is or what it does. |
| | Petchow Rat Poison - parody of misleading labels, Hank Petchow's brand of rat poison looks like dog food, is packaged in a 25 lb. bag with "PETCHOW" in large print, has a large photo of Petchow's dog, and the words "rat poison" in very fine print. |
| | Philadelphia - a line of action toys based on the 1993 movie of the same name. |
| | Phone Company - Features Lily Tomlin as a grouchy, apathetic operator who talks about the goings-on and imperfections of her company. "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the Phone Company." |
| | The Platinum Mach 14 - A razor with 14 blades. A parody of the increased number of blades on razors, when the Gillette Mach3 was released. Since then, Schick has released a 4 bladed razor (The "Quattro"), and Gillette has released a 5+1-bladed razor (The "Fusion"). Neither of these has had the retail success of the Mach3 to date. |
| | Pre-Chewed Charlie's - a steakhouse for people with dentures, where the waiters come to your table, and pre-chew your food for you. This parody satirized a small chain of restaurants near Times Square in New York City called Beefsteak Charlie's. |
| | Preparation H - skateboarding dudes, including Jimmy Fallon, plug Preparation H in urban slang ("I'm about ta drop an H-bomb on dis riz-oid!"). |
| | Puppy Uppers and Doggie Downers - Gilda Radner complains to Laraine Newman that her dog, Sparky, has no energy, so Newman recommends Puppy Uppers. Later, when the dog is hyperactive (and quite a bit smaller) Radner complains that "Sparky's perked up a little too much," so Newman recommends dosing him with Doggie Downers. |
| | Pussy Whip - the first dessert topping for cats (This was a sponsor of Weekend Update rather than an actual commercial.) Plays on the insult "pussy whipped" and the use of "Whip" in whipped-cream product names. |
| | Quarry - breakfast cereal made from rocks; "Better tastin', 'cause it's mined." |
| | RAD 3000 - a smoke detector that plays songs of the 80's |
| | ReaganCo. - Charles Rocket shows how you can show your patriotism by way of Ronald Reagan wallpaper, cosmetics, and bathroom tiles. |
| | Royal Deluxe II - 1970s car commercial parody that showed the smoothness of the car's ride by having a mohel perform a circumcision in the backseat while driving forty miles per hour on a bumpy road. (The ad it was spoofing had a gemcutter cutting a diamond in the back seat of a moving car.) |
| | Rubik's Grenade (1982) - Rubik's Cube parody; "Maybe the last puzzle you'll never solve." Another Rubik's cube commercial parody was Rubik's Teeth, a pair of dentures that act as a Rubik's cube. |
| | Scented Automobile Exhaust- Features Gilda Radner smiling as she crouches near a tailpipe. |
| | Schmitt's Gay - (Chris Farley & Adam Sandler) Spoofs beer companies targeting specific demographics. Two gay guys are housesitting and are discouraged at the dirty condition of the house's pool. When the water is turned on, however, it magically transforms into a clean pool filled with attractive, and apparently gay, men (the original broadcast featured the Van Halen song "Beautiful Girls," but syndicated broadcasts use generic rock guitar riffs, presumably due to licensing costs. Phil Hartman was the announcer for both versions). |
| | Shimmer - See New Shimmer |
| | Shirt in a Can - Tim Meadows spills something on his shirt, so he sprays on "shirt in a can" ---He says "burns my skin" [1] |
| | Speed- Writer Anne Beatts makes a rare on-screen appearance as a housewife able to happily multi-task, thanks to Speed, the diet pill you don't have to be overweight to use, obtainable from your doctor, your neighbor's doctor, your college roommate's doctor; etc. |
| | Spud Beer - Made from potatoes. The beer that made Boise famous! Writer Alan Zweibel appears as an electro-shock subject who enjoys Spud because it's the beer for people who can't taste the difference. |
| | Steve Martin's All-Natural Penis Beauty Cream - a parody of the celebrity infomercial boom. |
| | Stop-A-Nut - Protect yourself from muggers and the homeless by wearing an enormous (yet supposedly comfortable) metal suit. |
| | Sub Shack - a parody of the Subway Jared Fogle ad-campaign, with customers to the fast food restaurant gaining weight rather than losing it. |
| | Super Bass-O-Matic '76 and Super Bat-O-Matic '77 - parody of Ronco ads featuring Dan Aykroyd pureeing fish (and bats) in a blender. |
| | Swiffer Sleepers - parody of Swiffer ads with children's blanket sleepers designed to pick up dust and dirt as they crawl |
| | Swill - (Bill Murray) putrid mineral water "dredged from the bottom of Lake Erie". |
| | Taco Town - a restaurant that is a parody of Taco Bell, advertising a new taco with layer after layer of outer crust, finished with a Chicago-style pizza and blueberry pancake and "deep fried to perfection." Andy Samberg says of the product, "Pizza? Now that's what I call a taco!" In the original broadcast, a glitch caused the Wilson Bros. Funeral Home bumper graphic to appear during the sketch. View without the Funeral Home graphic |
| | Teddy Bear Holding a Heart - A spoof of a DeBeers commercial, where a guy gives his sweetheart a teddy bear holding a heart for Valentine's Day, the gift available practically everywhere. |
| | Texxon- An image ad allegedly touting the philanthopic efforts of a petroleum company turns out to be a thinly veiled threat of dire consequences if various legislation under consideration doesn't go the company's way, supposedly forcing it to scale back efforts to assist the needy: "Texxon. Do what we say, and nobody gets hurt." |
| | That's Not Yogurt - (Victoria Jackson and Kevin Nealon) Spoof of "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter". After eating, couple becomes very concerned about what the mysterious product actually IS, but coy announcer won't tell them. From the makers of "Those Aren't Olives". |
| | The Clams- Movie trailer for director Brian de Palma's rip-off of Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds". |
| | Three-Legged Jeans - Similar to Levi's. And hey, no dumber than acid-washed. The chorus of the reggae theme features the catchphrases, "Three at last" and "A leg and a leg and a leg" sung together. |
| | Tortumatic - The ultimate way to show others that you can take pain. Charles Rocket demonstrates it, getting punched repeatedly by a number of boxing gloves, and slamming his hand with a mallet. |
| | Tressant Suprème - Kelly Ripa spoofed the ubiquitous hair coloring ads in which she has appeared. In this skit, Ripa prefers Tressant Suprème because it contains "just a little bit of crack cocaine," thus explaining her stereotypical "peppy" persona. |
| | Trilocaine - a scalp itch medication with extremely disturbing side effects. "90% of users experience an instantaneous and horrifying sleep paralysis containing a bleak vision of mortality." |
| | Triple Trac Razor - a razor with three blades because the consumer is gullible enough to believe what he sees on TV commercials. Interestingly enough, this commercial parody aired in 1975 (on SNL's premiere episode) before multi-bladed men's razors even existed. |
| | Tryopenin - Arthritis medication in a bottle virtually impossible to open. |
| | Turlington's Lower Back Tattoo Remover - A product that, "when applied once, every hour, for 72 straight hours," slowly burns away unwanted lower back tattoos. "That tingling means it's working!" Tagline: "Because it won't be cool forever..." |
| | Tylenol BM - A laxative product, shown to cause you to defecate in your sleep. |
| | Uncle Jemima's Pure Mash Liquor - (Tracy Morgan & Tim Meadows) A subtle barb at products that perpetuate racial stereotypes, specifically Aunt Jemima, and also referencing Uncle Remus as shown in Disney's animated film Song of the South. |
| | United Way with Peyton Manning - Peyton Manning (as himself) is hired as a mentor to children, who proves to be a bad role model by physically and verbally abusing the kids during a football game (even going so far as to send one to sit in a Port-A-Potty after screwing up a play), using a girl to get a date, showing the kids how to break into an SUV (with ends with them running from the cops), drinking beer in front of them, cursing in front of them, and revealing his shady ethics ("All right, I'll kill a snitch. I'm not saying I have. I'm not saying I haven't..."). |
| | Urigrow |
| | Uvula Public Service Spot - With Chevy Chase as a physician urging Gilda Radner and the audience to take proper care of the uvula, without ever saying what the uvula is (actually, a small piece of flesh that hangs down from the rear portion of the soft palate and requires little, if any, maintenance). |
| | Veritas Ultrasound HD - Instead of a tiny monitor, the ultrasound is displayed on a widescreen HD television. It even has options to display a football helmet on the fetus (for dads-to-be missing Sunday football because of going to see the ultrasound). |
| | Wade Blasingame: Attorney-at-Law - The lawyer people call to sue dogs. |
| | Wilson Trap Doors - office trap doors that effectively drop unwanted employees. |
| | Woomba - a self-operating electronic feminine hygiene product that knows when women should use it, whether they want to or not, a parody of the Roomba automatic vacuum system. |
| | Yard-a-Pult - A product to launch unwanted trash/deceased pets/etc over your fence rather than disposing of them. |