Randy Quaid has appeared in over 90 films, but many of his most quotable lines are as “Cousin Eddie” in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. A thorn in Clark Griswold’s side, Eddie shows up unexpectedly at Clark’s house lighting ceremony and the merriment begins. Thank you, John Hughes, for giving Eddie some of the funniest holiday lines ever:
- Every time Catherine revved up the microwave, I’d piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so.
- I don’t know if I should go sailin’ down no hill with nothing between the ground and my brains but a piece of government plastic.
- Last season he was a pixie dust spreader on the Tilt-A-Whirl. He thinks that next year he’ll be guessing people’s weight or barkin’ for the yak lady.
- If only I had that money Catherine and I gave to that TV preacher who was screwin’ that hockey player.
- If this gets dented then my hair just ain’t gonna look right.
- She falls down a well, her eyes go cross. She gets kicked by a mule. They go back. I don’t know.
- Merry Christmas. Sh*tter was full!
- Oh, he’s just yakkin’ on a bone.
- Oh, no, that there is an RV.
- You don’t want him around if you’re wearing short pants, you know what I mean?
- Your company kill all them people in India not too long ago?
- If it isn’t too much I’d like to get somethin’ for you Clark, somethin’… real nice.
- Clark, I’d like to try to fumigate this here chair, it’s a good quality item. If you don’t mind my askin’, how much did she set you back?
- Save the neck for me, Clark.
